Tag: white belt

Beyond the Belt: The Mental Growth in Jiu Jitsu Promotions

When most people think about belt promotions in Jiu Jitsu, they envision mastered techniques, grueling rolls, and visible skill progression. While all these elements play an important role in our journey from one belt to another, there’s another equally important facet: the mental and emotional growth accompanying each promotion.

The Introspective Start

When I first put on the white belt, the world of BJJ was filled with raw enthusiasm, confusion, and endless learning. Every technique was a puzzle, every roll an exercise in humility. But it wasn’t just about understanding the techniques; it was a journey of introspection. As I grappled with opponents, I also grappled with my insecurities and doubts.

I was getting beat by everyone. It didn’t matter their age, weight, gender or athletic attributes. I came in thinking I was in shape. I lifted weight 4 to 5 days per week. I could bench press over 315lbs. None of that matter when I realized I didn’t have the conditioning to last 5 minutes grappling. I definitely had a reality check that shocked me and yet made me want to get better.

Unfortunately, a lot of new students when faced with the reality that they aren’t as good as they may have thought they were in their heads, quite before they have an opportunity to get better. It’s something about those that keep showing up, despite it all, that separates them from 99% of the world. The beautiful thing is, it has nothing to do with how tough they are, or how athletic they are. Some of them are soccer mom’s or introverted techys you’d never imagine would choose a sport as physically demanding as Jiu Jitsu for a hobby.

Blue Belt Blues and Mental Fortitude

When I was a white belt, I remember wanting to make it to blue, mostly because it would signify that I didn’t give up when many others had and especially when I wanted to.

Earning my blue belt was a monumental moment of pride, but it came with its unique challenges. The white belts seemed to come at me harder and the upper belts weren’t as gentle. On top of that, I wasn’t a newbie anymore so it felt like I couldn’t keep making stupid mistakes and blame it on me being a white belt.

Making it to blue was great but there is a lot of reasons many blue belts quit. Often referred to as the “blue belt blues,” this phase became a test of dedication. The initial excitement of starting BJJ had faded, and black belt seemed light-years away. It was during this phase that mental fortitude became important, and I learned to stop focusing on belts and just put my head down and grind.

More than techniques or skills, it was about showing up, even when I wasn’t motivated. It was about facing and acknowledging the self-doubt and then choosing to persevere. My teammates became even more important to me, more like family. They held me accountable to show up and train. Whenever I felt like quitting, unmotivated, like I as stuck, going backwards or downright sucked, my training partners uplifted me and challenged me to push through. I learned to have fun and to enjoy being a blue belt. I learned to embrace the grind.

Purple Belt: Embracing the Mental Complexity

About a month ago I was awarded my purple belt and it felt like stepping into a new realm. Initially I didn’t even want to be promoted. I felt like I wasn’t ready and I had learned to embrace being a blue belt. I didn’t want the pressure I felt came with being a purple belt.

Not only was there an expectation to refine techniques and showcase fluidity in movements, I felt pressure to be better than I thought I was. After talking to my coaches and some of my teammates, that initial anxiety wore off. I realized that being a purple belt meant I needed to have a shift in mental complexity.

There was an unspoken understanding that being a purple belt wasn’t just about what I did on the mats, but how I thought and felt. Emotions had to be regulated, strategies had to be formed, and mental agility became as crucial as physical agility.

As a purple belt, you’re often looked up to as a mentor and one of the leaders in the academy. Lower belts are watching you, not just how you roll but how you approach training, respect others and respect the art. You should be a good role model while also challenging yourself to be better on and off the mats.

One crucial aspect of this mental growth is the acceptance of imperfection. No matter the belt color, there will always be failures, mistakes, and missed opportunities. The purple belt phase reinforces the idea that growth often comes from acknowledging our flaws and continuously working on them.

So far, I am enjoying this phase. I am pushing myself to be more competition minded, even when not competing. I’m even more open to learning to be a better practitioner and more willing than ever to help others improve as well.

Anticipating the Future: The Road Ahead

As I think about the journey ahead – brown and, eventually, the coveted black belt – I recognize that the challenges will evolve. They’ll demand more than just technical prowess. They’ll require mental resilience, emotional intelligence, and an ever-present passion for the art. I anticipate moments of introspection, self-doubt, euphoria, and profound learning. And I believe that the mental and emotional growth I’ll experience will be as valuable, if not more so, than the physical.

Staying connected with my teammates will always be invaluable. Without them I would have never made it this far.

Conclusion

The belts we tie around our waist in Jiu Jitsu signify more than just technical abilities; they represent chapters of growth, both physical and mental. With each promotion, we don’t just become better martial artists; we become more resilient, introspective, and emotionally intelligent individuals. The journey is challenging, no doubt, but every obstacle, every moment of self-doubt, and every victory makes us not just better fighters but better individuals.

Don’t Be Afraid To Be A Beginner

Many people allow the fear of looking awkward or silly prevent them from trying something new. It could be anything from karaoke to going to their first yoga class. Just the thought of failing or looking clueless or awkward can be enough to prevent us from ever trying things we have dreamt of doing.

Remember when you first learned to walk or ride a bike? You probably don’t because it’s quite natural to you now, but if you see any old videos of yourself, you will see how unbalanced you were and how many times you fell, but never gave up. That’s what it is like trying something new. We can’t let the fear of looking stupid, like we don’t know what we are doing or even failing, rob us of the joy mastering (or at least being competent) in that area will bring.

That’s why I always get excited when I see new potential students come into our academy. Many of them are curious, they’ve always wanted to try Jiu Jitsu or some form of Martial Art but are apprehensive. Just walking through those doors for the first time can be extremely intimidating.

I remember when I first started training Jiu Jitsu and one of the hardest things I did was to walk through that door and start my first class. I had so much anxiety about it and most of my anxieties revolved around how silly I would look attempting to perform exercises and maneuvers I had never performed in my life.

I was worried about my conditioning because while I consider myself to be in somewhat decent shape, I knew I was not in the type of shape I thought I needed to be in for Jiu Jitsu. At that time, I was going to the gym and lifting weights nearly everyday, but I rarely did aerobic activity. I also knew that I could find a thousand excuses to keep putting off starting the class if I didn’t push myself to go despite those anxieties.

During my first few classes, I was really self-conscious and compared myself to everyone else. Most of the other guys were in better shape, quicker and more coordinated. I did feel like an awkward gorilla when we did many of the warmup exercises that required flexibility I didn’t have and left me sucking in air before the class even really begun. All of that started pushing doubt and excuses in my mind. “You’re too out of shape”, my inner critic said, “You’re too old, too tired, too busy” it added.

I live in my head like a lot of people, which isn’t always a good thing if you can’t master it. I had to quickly get out of my head. I did this by reminding myself that I was a beginner, and it was okay to look and feel like a beginner.

I had to tell myself that it was okay if I looked and felt awkward during the exercises, if I couldn’t perform some moves right, if at all. I told myself that it was okay if I got gassed during class and had to take a break. I was a beginner, and if there is ever a time to look awkward while trying your best, it’s when you’re a beginner.

Instead of being worried about being a beginner take advantage of it, embrace it.

When I started focusing more on myself and not on the other people in class things became easier. I had taken the pressure off of myself to be better than I reasonably could be. I pushed myself of course but took breaks when I needed to and learned to be unapologetic about it (by the way, no one ever made me feel bad about having to take a breather). I modified moves I couldn’t do until I could do them instead of getting upset, hurting myself or giving up out of frustration.

I worked on not caring about other people’s opinions.

So what if other guys in the class made fun of me or snickered about how this middle aged, muscular but uncoordinated guy flopped around on the mats like a fish out of water. They weren’t paying for my classes, I was. They weren’t in my shoes. We all have different lives and different goals. While some guys were there to compete for medals, I was there to get in shape and learn a martial art I had been curious about for over a decade. While some guys live to train, I have a full-time, stressful job and two young kids to divide my time with. Our goals and drives are completely different, and that’s okay.

Once I got out of my own head, allowed myself to be a beginner and stopped being concerned about what other people may think about me, things became fun! It helps that most people who train Jiu Jitsu seem to be non-judgmental and encouraging. You’ll hear them say, “We all started at the same point, don’t give up, just keep showing up”. And that’s exactly what I try to pass on to and motivate all new students when I see them struggling through warm-ups or getting frustrated that someone smaller than them is controlling them in ways they don’t yet understand.

I don’t think anyone ever looked at me and thought about how awkward I looked or how much my conditioning sucked. It was all in my head. Once I got out of my head and really focused on being mindful and present in the moment, I quickly realized I very rarely even thought about my dad bod, my clumsiness or my fitness level that much. As a matter of fact, Jiu Jitsu class became one of the few places I didn’t think too much about those things or other life problems at all. It became a stress reliever! That’s part of the reason I wanted to start this blog because Jiu Jitsu has helped me and so many others in ways that I would have never imagine if I didn’t embrace being new.

As far as Jiu-Jitsu is concerned, I am still a beginner and I allow myself to be a beginner, unapologetically.